Schism83 

member since 11/07/2011 | last login 10/22/2014

I'm short, my eyes are too close together, and, when I stand up quickly, my knees pop really loud. I'm terrible at love, sports, and beer pong, and I'm obssessed with the off-brand of 'Hot Cheetos' - 'Hot Fries'. To top it...

Bio

I'm short, my eyes are too close together, and, when I stand up quickly, my knees pop really loud. I'm terrible at love, sports, and beer pong, and I'm obssessed with the off-brand of 'Hot Cheetos' - 'Hot Fries'. To top it all off, I suffer from a lovely, malevolent curse - I'm convinced I'm a writer. So, I guess we'll see just how steep the stars are stacked against me. Keep the pen moving!

Submissions by Schism83

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Reviews by Schism83 72

  • A review of Semaphore
    by Schism83 on 08/10/2014
    Hey, Taij. Just read 'Semaphore, and here are my thoughts and comments. Despite myself, I liked this. I tend to shy away from verbose narratives and styles because I think they are unnecessarily long-winded, esp. in the context of today's fiction. I'm a strong believer in 'multum in parvo' because I think it's more effective in relaying ideas, is sharper in focus, and people... read
  • A review of Peace of War
    by Schism83 on 08/05/2014
    Hey, Cab. Just read 'Peace of War' and here are my thoughts and comments. This was a hard read for me. It's a good idea, but there are a lot of issues/problems the reader encounters all the way to the end. Below is an itemized list of things to consider. Some general notes, though: 1) when writing dialogue, it's almost always = He turned and said, "I don't care." = The... read
  • A review of Korban
    by Schism83 on 07/31/2014
    Hey, Cab. Lo' and behold - I got your 'Korban' on my list so here are my thoughts and comments. I thought this was really good. You start with a strong setting but mysterious/ambiguous goal; you set up the Good Samaritan well while hinting at a greater significance and providing layered and good dialogue along the way; and then you take us into the great Hall, where we get... read
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Comments About Schism83 52

  • Cab Coola on 08/05/2014

    Thanks for the review of 'Peace of War'. As previously stated, thanks for the helpful critiques.
  • Cab Coola on 08/01/2014

    Thanks again Schism, this time for the review of 'Korban'. Two in one night, much appreciated.
  • Cab Coola on 07/31/2014

    Hey Schism, thanks for the review of 'Lost love'. I appreciate the helpful critiques and look to sharpen it up on the revision. Thanks again.
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