Cherie 

member since 07/02/2006 | last login 08/04/2013

I wrote fiction, nonfiction, television animation, and comics years ago, and I continued to write after my daughter was born. But by the time she had entered kindergarten, I had quit, slipping so easily into the chores and delights of being a...

Bio

I wrote fiction, nonfiction, television animation, and comics years ago, and I continued to write after my daughter was born. But by the time she had entered kindergarten, I had quit, slipping so easily into the chores and delights of being a mom that I didn't even realize I had stopped writing. But now I've begun writing again, and I've really been enjoying TriggerStreet.com.

Submissions by Cherie

Reviews by Cherie 18

  • A review of Love Story
    by Cherie on 09/15/2006
    The opening images are effective and appropriate for a couple in love, and they set the mood well, as does the music; it contributes to the mood without being cloying or overly sentimental. The pacing is good; the length of the film is appropriate for the story you tell. The acting is believable and the dialog realistic. However, at one point, I became aware of how many times... read
  • A review of Everyday People
    by Cherie on 09/03/2006
    You’ve got an interesting plot that held my attention. The pacing felt right. I also enjoyed the diversity of your characters and their individuality, not only in how they responded to gaining super powers, but in how they approached life. For the most part, the dialog sounded like real people talking. Although I had some problems with certain aspects of your script, these... read
  • A review of Regular Army (rev)
    by Cherie on 07/29/2006
    I enjoyed reading this because I liked the main characters, Lisa and Kelli, so much. Their dilemma was presented in such a way as to be believable and sympathetic, and the ending packed an emotional punch. The scenes in which the goals and emotions of the characters are clear are also quite effective, as for example, when Lisa was regaining her composure in the toilet stall... read
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Comments About Cherie 1

  • **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 10/18/2008

    Very interesting review of Banshee. Some critiques I find valid, but most of them don't address the story I wrote.

    Is Ivor rich? Probably not. Does not need to be. Should I have presaged the china cabinet? I don't think so. Should any author make a list of what's in the house of the protagonist? There are instances where it is necessary, but many, MANY people have china cabinets. It could have been a bookcase or entertainment center that fell on him. I think it would be perfectly anal and boring to make a list of objects you'd find in nine out of ten homes people like Ivor own.

    Would he be influential with the local law if he was so rotten and mean? Yes. One inspiration for Ivor was one of the meanest souls one can imagine-though he was not a killer-and he was in tight with the law around those parts.

    Think about it from his viewpoint, and mine as the writer...He would HAVE to be tight with the sheriff in order to get away with his occasional sojourns into murder. Or do you think he killed a kid every Halloween? I don't think so.

    I started off the story and described events the way I wanted to. Ivor lacks redeeming qualities, but he's hardly one-dimensional. Just because he's mean to his cats and children doesn't mean at all that there's nobody he likes. It's funny...IF I started Banshee off with so-so events-Ivor stubbed his toe and Taps meowed like she was laughing, the rest of the story would make little sense and readers would be on that like hogs at the trough...and I wouldn't blame them.

    For you, the intensity was the same throughout the story, with no rest for the wicked. Your opinion and you're entitled to it. I disagree with that conclusion.

    Why was the writing on that mirror? Let us think a bit here...Yes...It fits in with Sherman's personality, as is shown by his banter earlier with Ivor. And he wanted to let Ivor in on the secret, and, since people like Ivor call their local law enforcement officers for almost any reason, it fits that Sherman would let the sheriff know the story, so Ivor would hear the truth from someone he respected. And, it was done out of respect for the readers. Otherwise, how would the sheriff have known the score? Whether ivor died four years earlier or four days earlier, why would he think he was talking to a ghost, unless he knew the events?

    While your criticisms are valid in some respects, the solutions presented would work fine for a story you would be writing on a similar plot. I said what I wanted to say with Banshee, the way I wanted to say it. Some readers will like it, some love it, and some hate it. No matter how I write...or how you write, or how Rowling writes, or how Shakespeare writes--fill in the blanks--SOMEBODY will not like it. My solution? Write it the way I want, see if it works for me, change the things that don't, then let it loose and start another story or painting or whatever. Doing art any other way, for an artist/writer/whatever, like me is foolish. I would not know what to write etc. and produce anything anyone would want to look at twice.

    I do tend to repeat words where even I don't want them repeated. It's something I'm always fighting against and I've gotten better since Banshee, which is something like twenty stories back in time. As I said, a cogent review, with many things for me to think about if I ever re-write Banshee. If I take your advice-and the advice of several other reviewers, the re-written story will have a completely different flavor. Maybe a better flavor. Will I want to do that?

    No.

    I will write many more stories. The critiques will be used or discarded as I see fit, but the critiques have helped me learn to be more watchful. I will write my own tales, however, just as my reviewers should write their own stories.

    Thanks for the review!

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