Jackie Case 

member since 11/06/2009 | last login 05/09/2013

I'm trying....

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I'm trying.

Submissions by Jackie Case

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Reviews by Jackie Case 37

  • A review of A Tru Fairytale
    by Jackie Case on 11/16/2011
    I really enjoyed reading your screenplay. It was an easy, entertaining and simply a joy to read. You have a concise and efficient writing style which is a credit to your writing craft and I commend you. Well done! Each character has their own voice and each was distinct and memorable, which is a huge feat. Your story was both entertaining, and more importantly (and some times... read
  • A review of THE BEACH
    by Jackie Case on 08/26/2011
    This is my first short film review ( I usually hang around screenwriting) and so I’ll do my best given my limited knowledge. There was a really sweet element to this film which I really liked. And I must admit a real sense of sadness when I watched the last frame, which I don’t think was entirely intentional. First off I will suggest a closer look at your placement of characters... read
  • A review of Mark of the Veil
    by Jackie Case on 03/17/2011
    Mark of the Veil I’ve been reading your thread about how worried you are having put up a screenplay. I perfectly understand. Look, you clicked refresh and here is another review… Now this can be hard to review for a ‘film maker’ rather then ‘screenwriter’. Please allow me to clarify. I assume you are more interested in ‘story’ rather then ‘screenwriting technique’, even though... read
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Comments About Jackie Case 39

  • **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 12/02/2011

    Hi,

    Your very welcome. I believe your SP deserves higher marks than what I see.

    You had me on the edge of my seat with Suto at the end. I though he was a goner for sure with the electric fence.

    Anyhow, I hope you get a better reviewer than me with the skill set who can offer you advance sound advice.

    Keep up the good work!

    Will
  • **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 12/01/2011

    Hey Jackie,

    Thanks for your review of Liam and Theo. I appreciate the time you've taken and will make good use of your notes in future drafts.

    Thanks again

    Tony
  • Jeff H on 11/19/2011

    Hi Jackie,

    Thanks for taking the time to read and review my screenplay. I'm definitely getting the feeling that my page count is scaring away TS readers, so I really appreciate that you decided not to delete this assignment like several others have already. Getting the page count down is certainly one of the reasons I decided to post our script on TS. I was hoping that, based on what TS readers thought, I could figure out the best places to cut from. My writing partner and I have shown it to a few friends, but I wanted to get the unbiased opinions of people we didn't know or who weren't already familiar with Alan's story.

    You see, most (if not all) of our friends and family are already quite familiar with Alan's story because, well, Alan is family. My writing partner, Jenny, is not only my wife, but she's also Alan's daughter (young Jennifer in the screenplay). Several years ago, she and I made a documentary about her father that was fairly well received (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0437780/). After showing it at several film festivals, we got enough comments from people saying that Alan's story would make a great movie that we decided to go ahead and try and to write a narrative version ourselves. But because all of our friends and family have either seen the documentary or know Alan personally, we’re finding it hard to get opinions from our intended target audience, which would be people who have never heard of Alan or his story.

    By the way, I really liked your film mash-up description of the script: “The Yes Men Who Stare at Goats.” “Goats” was indeed a script that I looked at for it’s narrative structure, although my initial inspiration was “Citizen Kane.” And it’s funny that you mentioned the Yes Men, because they have credited Alan for being an inspiration for what they do. They even invited him to help them with one of their stunts a couple of years back, but unfortunately that never panned out.

    There was one thing about your review that I was curious about: At the end, after you Googled Alan and realized that he was a real person, did it make you see the screenplay in a different way? I’m just wondering because, obviously there were certain decisions we made about that story that were based on the facts of what really happened, and not on how we might have written it if it was just a story that we made up. For instance, the reason the SINA hoax section (clothing naked animals) is so long is because not only is it one of Alan’s first and best known stunts, but also because it really did go on for years.

    Speaking of going on too long, I think I’ll wrap it up here. Thanks again for your review. I’m still not sure if you actually liked the story or not, but you did give a few things to think about.

    Cheers,
    JH
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