• A review of Indian Summer
    by tishanddavid on 12/07/2014
    Hi Taylor, Haven t read one of your stories in a while. I know Dave really enjoys your work, I'm thinking he might have gotten more out of this then I was able, too. I was exited by the concept, thought it was a good title. Basically I was expecting a Twilight Zone type tale. I felt like this story was very disconnected. You never really invested in any one character.The small... read
  • A review of Quantum Effects
    by sergiev2 on 12/06/2014
    Rex, It's always a pleasure to read your stories. Your knack for narrative and character is top notch. In the case of Bethany's quarrell with Mr. Hanson, I was not for one second convinced these characters were not talking in some reality other than my own. I know we're suppsoed to be be improving eachother's writing on here, but when I can't do that, I think it proper to... read
  • A review of Place in the Sun
    by tishanddavid on 12/06/2014
    Well, this will most likely be one of my last reviews on TS. I am happy to say that I added you too our favorites list (for all the good it does now!)I loved this. I mean I really did. It has some small issues like tenses, some typos after the first few pages, repetitive words in sentences, and you had some moments were it was very slow. BUT, that's all pretty minor in the... read
  • A review of N.I.K.E.
    by shastina456 on 12/05/2014
    This story was excellent, until the very end. I felt it was best to end with Bob and Albert to just go on with their lives normally after the episode. You left the story open for a sequel, because of the sign that read, " Now I Kill Extraterrestrials. " You really could have wrapped this story up and went on to a new tale. I know people will enjoy a sequel, but I believe it... read
  • A review of Mother's Time
    by craigmorrow on 12/03/2014
    A very bitter sweet tribute to a mother. The writing is gentle and soothing much like the mother described in this piece. I liked it and it made me think of moments I had with my mom when I was a kid. The story doesn't have any narrative to speak about. I don't know what you're chosing to do with this story. If you're looking to inspire people in the same situation, you might... read
  • A review of Mother's Time
    by teresa murphy on 11/28/2014
    This is a beautifully written piece. It was excellent at evoking emotions such as sadness and I could almost taste the mother- daughter love. I do not have any serious criticisms of the story but I do have a few suggestions. I feel that the structure could be changed just a little because, although beautifully worded, did tend to go on a bit. Maybe add some specifics, hint... read
  • by shastina456 on 11/27/2014
    The title would have made more sense to me as, " The Connection Principle. " There was not much going on with this story, just mainly Megan and the principal eating and talking at a picnic. The end was too sudden. I think an ending where Megan and the principal were eating dinner at a restaurant would have been better, because it would have shown that they were actually dating... read
  • by Dale Swaby on 11/27/2014
    Okay, there's two sides to the coin and that is good and bad although I'll be inbetween reaching out like a scorned mermaid bellowing the first point, if you're new to this forget the first comment, me, as well, (when); layout. Incohesive structure to the PDF was making such a good story detract the purpose of what a - short story should be. Simple. That aside, punctuation... read
  • A review of Casey's Last Meal
    by James Moriarty on 11/26/2014
    TAYLOR delivers neat, clean copy that leads to a neat, clean ending. Good writing: "bites the big one," "pushed out a fresh one," "beautiful log," "power, notoriety..." "breasts grabbing," leads to "another good man." unconscious = unconscious ? TAYLOR writes the lingo of a western town: "I dun quite recall." and in the process tells the story of a man who is expected... read
  • A review of 5-12
    by James Moriarty on 11/26/2014
    TheAuthor has written a story with an experimental structure not unlike the NUCLEIC ACID modeling of WATSON & CRICK. The two nobel prize winners in biology worked the double helix until they got it right. (LINUS PAULING thought it was a triple helix.) TheAuthor seems to be using four variables which the astute reader can adjust until they get a story they like. That's what... read
  • A review of Place in the Sun
    by theauthor on 11/26/2014
    This work proved more interesting than I expected. It was an obvious but a good metaphor. For that reason alone, this story survives. I find however, that there is no need to explain it in the last paragraph. It would be better to ax the explanation and let the reader mull it over. A little dialogue from the shopkeeper would also add an element that this story is missing. And... read
  • A review of Junk Food
    by jojoe on 11/25/2014
    cm, when you add details, such as "black denim", that do not advance the story, you distract from the story. And, you have a ton of such details. The clever thing to do is to add sights, sounds, and smells that are pertinent to the story, such as the junkie's body odor. The story itself is okay, although rushed to get to the punchline. You could have developed the three characters... read
  • A review of Happy Mudder's Day
    by micheleraedejean on 11/24/2014
    I wanted to end my reviewing career on this site with an even number and you are number four hundred! Alright. I have to admit the title of this story reminded me of the time I stupidly went four wheeling with some guys I met in the back water town my parents moved me and my sister to when we were young teenagers. the first, and last time I went four wheeling we got stuck in... read
  • A review of Mother's Time
    by shastina456 on 11/21/2014
    Seems as though this really happened to you. Could have been more to the tale. Showing words to the lullabies would have enriched the story. More memories about the mother would have been good. Seemed the story was only told from the mind of a little girl, so there was limitation there. Nothing was mentioned about the dad, which made me wonder if he was ever around. The ending... read
  • by micheleraedejean on 11/21/2014
    This is an interesting premise, along the lines of another story I read here about a man who didnít know he was an alien. My first thought was that anyone who has had an organ transplant is kind of a Frankenstein, but that wasn't the chosen path. There are monsters running about all over the place, racists, serial killers, bullies, etc. I would think a doctors first response... read
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