"Anything you’re good at contributes to happiness."

- Bertrand Russell

Reviews

  • A review of Charlie's Chop House
    by micheleraedejean on 10/01/2014
    The author says this story is inspired by a visit to Applebee’s or TGI Friday’s as a themed (Chain is the word I would use) restaurant. This story would be stronger with a shorter and tighter rewrite, too much is given away too soon. “Their breath puffed in the cold air” seems like it should be they could see their breath in the cold air. A restaurant that is run by vampires... read
  • by theauthor on 10/01/2014
    A hard driving tale of somber times for a young boy. I think the opening sells the story. The short ending does the story justice. A fine story told in such a brief fashion. I've read quite a bit here obviously and this tale deserves to be a spotlight. Many other works in the spotlight fall woefully short. I hope to read your other works. Thanks for your submission. A tale... read
  • A review of The Tontine
    by theauthor on 10/01/2014
    Very good story narration. I think sticking with the curse alone would improve this story as the description of the spirit's history took away from the story. The story itself was great. The dialogue was weak at times, but it moved the story forward. I would shorten this by ten pages, but lengthen the scenes where the men died. Describe it, don't merely drop it on us. This... read
  • A review of CancerRocksNow
    by cmcloughlin1218 on 10/01/2014
    Ok...So I get what you did, but it never made any sense. You had a character without description, a story without plot, and a structure...without structure. This may be avant garde material and it may something that would be enjoyed by readers of William S Burroughs but I didn't like it. I'm not saying it's awful, but it's just playing cut and paste and trying to make it your... read
  • A review of The Belt
    by cmcloughlin1218 on 10/01/2014
    I understand that the young dishwasher was afraid of girls and that he had a crush on the gorgeous redhead, but why would he be so weird about her giving him a gift? It didn't really add up and wouldn't he be proud that a girl so fair would be sweet to him? The characters could've been drawn a little better. The fry cook was made out to be a villain, so I would've liked to... read
  • A review of A New Life
    by theauthor on 10/01/2014
    This story had a good build up to it and the expected action fell into place. There were too many grammar issues. Some paragraphs were not indented, way too many one sentence paragraphs, and a misuse of italics. The final paragraph seemed redundant and weakened the strength of the story. What was "click-flash"? A camera? Overall, a decent tale of why you shouldn't meet people... read
  • A review of Smothered
    by theauthor on 10/01/2014
    I was thoroughly confused by the back story here. I read it twice and still don't see the main characters clearly. It jumps too much into the middle of the story for me. (I'm sure some readers got it. I won't give the story bad marks, as it might be my own fault. But clearly, something needs to be more direct on the characters.)There is a lot of talking that seems to boil down... read
  • A review of Baby On Board
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 09/30/2014
    Baby Overboard! This was an interesting tale about a man named Jim, who sat in his Honda, lamenting about how his life turned out. He drank his tequila while watching a young couple, who resembled his past relationship, walk down to the water with a baby in their arms. He began to doze off when he noticed them toss the baby over, or was it a baby? He didn't know. The concept... read
  • A review of Cliche
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 09/30/2014
    (Spoilers) This story started out with a husband waking in the early morn with one thing on his mind... sex. But, his wife wasn't feeling the same happy-go-lucky feeling. She finds toothpaste spread all over the bathroom walls because the husband left the top off and the son went a little crazy with it. He arrives at work, and things aren't much better. He's threatened to... read
  • by cmcloughlin1218 on 09/30/2014
    I like this story. It moved very fast and left the reader wanting more. I wonder if this is part of a series, if it isn't it most certainly should be, or part of a larger story at least. The main character is not quite shallow and not quite greedy but I could see that he has those two traits inside of him somewhere. The story about the glass isn't all that interesting, it... read
  • A review of Voodoo Chile - D.2
    by cmcloughlin1218 on 09/30/2014
    This is a good story. It is surreal, out of this world weird, but a good story. I don't understand the reason behind the affair. I don't get the strange man behind the wheel with a conception that he's the voodoo chile. You wrote great descriptions and carried this short to where it needed to be, and as most will feel that this story is incomplete and has massive holes, I am... read
  • A review of Only When I Dream
    by telliott on 09/29/2014
    Always displaying a keen imagination, this writer’s work keeps improving. Tenacity and determination could be middle names. A young boy travels places in his dreams. He begins to do this with a best friend, then with his wife. An accident renders him comatose (I think). So he only sees his beloved Mara in dreams. I provide reviews in the hopes of helping to improve a story... read
  • A review of Skids
    by Visionscribe on 09/29/2014
    Skids Hi Taylor – You’ve got sooooo much going for you in the way of creativity and imagination. You’ve got great concepts in every story I’ve read of yours, and I can tell that you’ve got entire worlds in your head as you conceive of your ideas. That is fantastic. As you continue to learn more of the nuts & bolts of writing, hang onto your imagination at all costs.... read
  • by Visionscribe on 09/29/2014
    Apartment Infinity This story is part one of more. It’s basically about an apartment in the city, where a dimension transcending device allows infinite clones to traverse their own (infinite) dimensions and exist simultaneously in the dimension of the story. The reason for this device is, apparently, to generate infinite rent dollars to the landlord. If the landlord charges... read
  • by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 09/29/2014
    The story was about a boy, who would take a trip with his family, every-so-often. to his grandparents house. On the way, his dad would take a break at a rest area. There, they would sit at a picnic table under a maple tree. His father told the child of tales about the tree and how long it had been standing, shading people from the hot sun. But, one day they made their stop... read