"You donít write because you want to say something; you write because youíve got something to say."

- F.†Scott†Fitzgerald

Reviews

  • A review of Paper Bull
    by blueberryjim on 06/29/2014
    First off you did a really good job creating characters. Within the first couple paragraphs I felt like I had a really good grasp on the kind of person Paul was. Just the fact that he was involved in some pretty dark stuff laid a great groundwork for who this guy was. I could completely believe that heís the kind of guy who talks to imaginary friends who sit on his shoulder... read
  • A review of Farrah
    by dreff on 06/30/2014
    I think you have a solid draft here, the story flows, its a quick read, sammy is likeable and there is plenty of funny here. I'm going to focus on the things that I think need work, but overall I think this is a good script: For the most part, the characters are solid, with a few holes. Daniel seems very inconsistent, he seems to vasolate between sweet guy, oblivious guy,... read
  • A review of House of Gates V. 2
    by DavidStokes on 06/30/2014
    CONCEPT / LOGLINE: This screenplay has ĎHammerí written all over it and I can imagine that, if they hadnít already made ďWoman In BlackĒ (which covers similar ground in tone and setting) itís a movie they would love to make. It screams old school British horror from the 60ís and 70ís. The only downside is, if your screenplay was to be made, it would have a hard time differentiating... read
  • A review of The Burial
    by Russ2007 on 06/30/2014
    OPENING TWENTY FIVE PAGES: Questions you need to ask yourself: Do they establish the tone of the story? Do they set up the world this story is set in? Do these opening scenes hook and draw the reader into the world the characters live in? Are the opening pages written cleanly, efficiently and easy to follow? Are the character introductions long winded? STORY / PLOT: Is... read
  • A review of Necessary Evil
    by swantonjohn on 06/30/2014
    Necessary Evil Plot: A mysterious caller tells a criminal defence lawyer that he has to follow his every instruction, or the caller will kill the lawyers wife and child. Saw meets 12 Rounds in this technically proficient and fast paced thriller. Although well handled, the setup and the twist both felt very familiar, but there were some really strong moments of drama - the... read
  • by Cab Coola on 06/30/2014
    An eye for an eye. This story started off with a son inheriting a farm from his father. He finds him getting harassed by some local hooligans until one day he had enough. This is brought on by several howls from a wolf at night. Each howl getting closer than the last. Until finally he comes back home and finds his blunderbuss broken and his door kicked in. He takes it out... read
  • A review of Relief
    by Cab Coola on 06/30/2014
    Finally, he can get some shut eye. Very well-written story about overcoming one's fear. It seemed as if the protagonist needed this to happen to finally get peace. In dreams, he was unable to react, frozen in his bed but upon, catching the thief in real life, he realized how strong he could be which ultimately gave him relief. I only saw one minor error: "At some point... read
  • A review of Farrah
    by Nox111 on 06/30/2014
    For the starters, let me tell you the positives. Excellent dialogues. For a comedy-drama it checks the right boxes. The repartee, the exchange, the tension and the development reflects the work of a professional. Excellent work. I loved how the arc progressed. Riveting. Keeping that said there are two typos I could spot- its not "Dali Llama" its "Dalai Llamai". But having... read
  • A review of Farrah
    by max zugu on 06/30/2014
    This screenplay was enjoyable, although the characters and situations are ones that we've seen before. The shlubby guy, the handsome guy, the hot girl are all characters that have appeared in other movies. They are well-drawn here, and the banter can be witty in a 40's movie kind of a way. Some of the humor works, such as the scene with the waitress on page 14. But, some of... read
  • A review of Farrah
    by zardoz13 on 06/30/2014
    This is a great draft. The structure and pacing are on point. The characters are distinct from each other and believable. They seem like a real group of friends. The dialogue is very natural sounding and there are plenty of laughs. The biggest issue I had was with how quickly Sammy and Farrah come to hate each other. They hate each other from the second they meet. It's explained... read
  • A review of Paul-pulation Bomb
    by BUNKER on 06/30/2014
    Well, I read the title when I read the story last night, I just didn't think much of it until right now when it registered what it actually says and how it relates to the story. Speaking of the story, I'm a fan of the style, writing and overall tale. The only suggestions that I would make is the use of the cancer early in the story. I feel the story would be much stronger... read
  • A review of Farrah
    by Untitled8 on 07/01/2014
    Pg. 1 "A body sculpted by Michelangelo, a face painted by angels." I get what you are going for but this line just might be a bit too much cheese for its own good. Pg. 5 "DANIEL Wow, really? I had no idea IT'S been that long. Jeez, time flies. So just so you know, I review and make notes as I go. So far I can tell that you know what you're doing. Your writing is solid and... read
  • A review of Track Changes
    by filmfamman on 07/01/2014
    This was more of an essay then a story, but it was well written none the less. Yes, modern convenience and the information age is a double edged sword. Big Brother Face Book is already invading our privacy, but is the downside worth the up side? But as you pointed out later in your essay, if they can down load the contents of our brains, they do not really have the true... read
  • A review of 3 Days
    by stevles on 07/01/2014
    I'd like to get the typos out of the way, first. Passenger doo for "door", (pg. 24) I'm know for "I", (pg.32) Loose sleep for "lose", (pg. 45) He is wears, for he wears, (pg.49) Character names BRAVO 3, 4, etc., include the month SEPTEMBER. Make it "pass" for pay, (pg. 87) There are several others sprinkled throughout the last 27 pages, but... well, you get the idea. Finally,... read
  • A review of Angel
    by micheleraedejean on 07/01/2014
    The writing was good and the story easy to follow but there are a lot of details in this story about things that I didnít care about. Somehow this didnít strike me as a first time experience. I was also sixteen my first time but it was with a seventeen year old boy who didnít know much more than I did. It wasnít until I went out with a twenty one year old when I was eighteen... read