Review of: Memories 

reviewed by Suesea on 10/05/2010
Credited Review
Suesea
A little sad and a little confused Credited Review
The structure of this story is different, and at first, it threw me off. It was more a list of memories than a story. It wasn't until the end, the last paragraph, that I got an idea why the writer chose this style. The story is brief and powerful, but I'm not sure what to say about it.

I'm reflecting on the message and the structure that was used. I'm not sure if telling the story with characters, dialog, and showing his struggle through actions would better suit the message. As it is, the story touched my heart, but I lost my grandfather to Alzheimer's. So, I'm going to be more sensitive to the issue. However, someone else may be impacted more if you were to write this with a more recognizable design. That's purely speculative and maybe the way you have written it makes the story stand out more? How confusing is that? Sorry, I'm not more helpful.

Overall, I liked the story. I think the initial confusion at the structure actually adds to the message. It may be that the one telling the story, the main character, is having trouble writing the story due to the alzheimer's and is just trying to get his memories down on paper. Well, as you can see, this story's style stumped me a little, but why should they all be written the same?

Good job.

Suesea

Other Reviews by Suesea 171

  • A review of Caution While Merging
    by Suesea on 10/08/2010
    This screenplay starts a bit slow. It appears as though not much is happening on the first ten-20 pages. The characters are going about their daily routine, however, the writer is carefully laying the foundation for some incredible, jaw dropping, twists and turns. The structure of the screenplay (the format) is good, but I have a feeling that the slow pace of the first 20... read
  • by Suesea on 10/07/2010
    That was a superficial take on some serious subjects. I have to say I wasn't expecting the ending. At one point, I thought vampires, but it turned out way different. I just read your production notes and see that you have posted a final draft. If it's assigned to me, I'd be glad to review it as well. Since I read this one, I'm going to go ahead and post my notes. Since... read
  • A review of Play It Where It Lays
    by Suesea on 10/07/2010
    You accomplished what you intended. I finished this story with a chuckle and a smile. It's definitely well written and an entertaining piece. The concept works well in this format, but I can also picture it as a screenplay. It seems a perfect beginning to a twisted comedy. There's not much description of the two characters. I thought adding some physical description would... read
+ more reviews