A Qualified Recommend!
This screenplay is a little rough, but so are diamonds when they first come out of the ground. I can't be certain this one is a gem, but I think it has enough potential to give it a recommend. The dialogue is its weakest part. The concept is good, and the story that develops is excellent. Or, at least, will be excellent with a few tweaks. I would just rework this and decide what to focus on: the ride, the mystery, or the relationships. Some of it was unbelievable, but that was mostly having to do with the mystery, so that is the area I would work on (or maybe even remove althogether). Good luck on the next draft.
NOTE: This review does not factor into the site rankings.
Other Reviews by noahc 6
A review of The ReturnThis is an amazing short. I loved it. It was the concept and story that really did it for me. Everything else was good, which is good, and did just was needed to be done; but, it was the story by far that got me. I don't even want to say anything more really, because I don't want to give anything away. I wouldn't change a thing.
A review of What's Wrong with This Picture?I loved this little short. It is a great spoof of a public service announcement. I thought the quoted statistics were a perfect touch. And I thought the child, Aidan, did a great job. I know kids can be hard to work with, so you have to give the director/dad credit for doing such a good job. Very funny work indeed.
A review of Cast of EaglesI gave this a "consider" based on the condition that it be thoroughly reworked. The dialogue, especially, needs to be redone. Way to talkie in parts. Also, the story itself is way to long. I am not sure what to say about how expensive it would be to film, and how hard it would be to find the aircraft. I am not sure if that should even be part of the review process or not... read