Other Reviews by mwiings 32

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  Not Love at First Sight
  A review of Thy Will Be Done
  by mwiings on 02/22/2013
  When I first started reading this I was a little thrown by the voice and I even pulled out my pen to start making corrections and page one and two suffered however, once I reached page three I "got it" and there isnt a mark after "when?" and I must say I am a fan and it ended too early. This was very well executed and the only correction I feel you should make is on page two... When I first started reading this I was a little thrown by the voice and I even pulled out my pen to start making corrections and page one and two suffered however, once I reached page three I "got it" and there isnt a mark after "when?" and I must say I am a fan and it ended too early.
  
  This was very well executed and the only correction I feel you should make is on page two "Many believe that Sherly might be alive since his body was never found" This sentence remains too jarring and once revised I believe the beginning may even be forgivable.
  
  Overall, thoroughly enjoyable. read
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  Ignorance Isnt Bliss
  A review of The Cascade ( Revised )
  by mwiings on 02/21/2013
  This story was brief and had punch. An enjoyable read overall. I did pause on the first sentence over the use of the word “stood” in that context but I believe it makes the scene more “statuesque” and on my second read it fit a lot better and I wasn’t jarred out of the scene. I do think that Foster would have been better served with more description on him as a person and... This story was brief and had punch. An enjoyable read overall.
  
  I did pause on the first sentence over the use of the word “stood” in that context but I believe it makes the scene more “statuesque” and on my second read it fit a lot better and I wasn’t jarred out of the scene.
  
  I do think that Foster would have been better served with more description on him as a person and not so much his appearance. You don’t really get that big a shock of him crucifying the American because the tether to the land isn’t that solid. It is present but not cemented but I still enjoyed it though.
  read
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  Dont forget the moral in the tale
  A review of Das Leben Dieb
  by mwiings on 12/11/2011
  I simply love this story. I am a fan of faery tales and this is a wonderful way of weaving it into a modern “story” without losing its tale-like quality. As I love it so much there are only 2 things I can think of to improve it. Your imagery is very strong and there was only one scene that didn’t work for me: in the beginning when Bill strokes his wife’s tummy she hums to... I simply love this story. I am a fan of faery tales and this is a wonderful way of weaving it into a modern “story” without losing its tale-like quality. As I love it so much there are only 2 things I can think of to improve it. Your imagery is very strong and there was only one scene that didn’t work for me: in the beginning when Bill strokes his wife’s tummy she hums to herself. Humming to oneself is a weird visual so you might want to revise that phrase for I found myself wondering what you mean because unless otherwise stated a hum is usually for one’s own purpose so I got a little distracted trying to figure out if there was something else to the phrase that I was possibly missing out on.
  On page 16 this sentence needs to be tweaked: “He didn't what else to do but to reach back.”
  
  Other than that I look forward to reading more of your work. read