Review of: Churchly Challenges 

reviewed by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 03/25/2012
Credited Review
**DELETED ACCOUNT**
Churchly Challenges Credited Review
I really struggled to see the point of your short story. There is nothing wrong with it, however, it was mundane reading four pages of someone’s inter-thoughts while at church. The character's own demons; his perspective on life and that of the other church goers attending mass. We all have these thoughts. In church, work, or whatever and there was nothing juicy about it.

I know your work is dear and close to your heart, but it did not have any entertainment value with me. The fact, that the main character hates germs, did not lent any uniqueness to him, however, you piece is well-written. The synopsis implies it is eight pages long, when it is only four. Lastly, I would put it is written by on the first page and the word count if you chose to do a rewrite. All the best with you writing.

Other Reviews by **DELETED ACCOUNT** 3429

  • A review of 206 rev 3
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 05/31/2014
    Shortly into the story, I recognized that ‘206’ is about H.H. HOLMS, a prolific serial killer. He lived in Chicago in the late nineteenth century; killed many—in every imaginable way. I’ve seen a couple of documentaries on this evil beast and I also remember that he hit his stride during the ‘World’s Fair’. I liked your opening with Holms as a young boy in New Hampshire;... read
  • A review of MAJOR PLAYERS
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 05/29/2014
    There’s a lot to like here. I cared about Ray Ray and liked the script as a whole. He wants to leave the past behind after a stretch in prison and resume his boxing career. He gets caught up in the life once again with his cousin Vince. In this life, Ray Ray pursues Heaven. He has to fight for her love and respect. Naturally, she’s out of his league; on her way up to become... read
  • A review of SLIP/THROUGH
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 05/28/2014
    Wow. I don’t know where to begin, so I’ll start off by saying—I did enjoyed SLIP/THROUGH. And regardless of what I think, you deserve kudos tackling something this complicated; constructing into a cohesive story fairly well. Overall, it was a terrific story, and out of my league to critique. I’ll do what I can and best wishes! My major grip is with the opening TITLE CARD:... read
+ more reviews