Review of: Churchly Challenges 

reviewed by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 03/25/2012
Credited Review
**DELETED ACCOUNT**
Churchly Challenges Credited Review
I really struggled to see the point of your short story. There is nothing wrong with it, however, it was mundane reading four pages of someone’s inter-thoughts while at church. The character's own demons; his perspective on life and that of the other church goers attending mass. We all have these thoughts. In church, work, or whatever and there was nothing juicy about it.

I know your work is dear and close to your heart, but it did not have any entertainment value with me. The fact, that the main character hates germs, did not lent any uniqueness to him, however, you piece is well-written. The synopsis implies it is eight pages long, when it is only four. Lastly, I would put it is written by on the first page and the word count if you chose to do a rewrite. All the best with you writing.

Other Reviews by **DELETED ACCOUNT** 3429

  • A review of Totally To The Max
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 07/25/2014
    After FADE IN: what does "SUBURBS, NORTHEAST USA, MID 80s, END OF SUMMER" mean? If the writer intends on that text being seen on the screen then it needs to be preceded with SUPER: "SUBURBS, NORTHEAST... Page 1. There is an extra space between Mamie's dialogue and the parenthetical (to Allison). Putting this reader on guard for more problems. An experienced reader is jarred... read
  • A review of 206 rev 3
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 05/31/2014
    Shortly into the story, I recognized that ‘206’ is about H.H. HOLMS, a prolific serial killer. He lived in Chicago in the late nineteenth century; killed many—in every imaginable way. I’ve seen a couple of documentaries on this evil beast and I also remember that he hit his stride during the ‘World’s Fair’. I liked your opening with Holms as a young boy in New Hampshire;... read
  • A review of THE MAFIA TYPE
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 05/30/2014
    It is always a challenge for me to deal with anything that has that "mafia" thing label on it. Hence, I was relieved and pleasantly surprised that the film has not much to do with either violence or mafia proper, but is a rather light short comedy. One of the merits of the work is its flow, something not all that common in shorts, in low budget ones in particular - I appreciated... read
+ more reviews