Flood of Tears is the story of a British man who is caught in the Thailand during the tragic tsunami which occurred several years back. He goes there on a vacation that his family got for him and has a romance with a woman there who is reminiscent of (or actually) a childhood memory. The tragedy prompts him to finally grieve his deceased daughter, and reconnect with his ex-wife.
Your format was smooth and the read never got terribly bogged down. Characters were well rounded, distinct and had good dialog. Harry is quite likable, so that's good. I was certainly intrigued with the Susie-Sue thing, but was a bit confused as to whether or not Sumalee was actually the girl from the tin, all grown up.
I think there are two major issues with the script. The first is your structure. The tsunami doesn't hit until after page 50. Such a big thing that affects the main character so greatly should come a lot earlier, I think. If you are building a script using traditional screenplay structure (and I think a story like this certainly benefits from a traditional structure) the tsunami should come before page 20. Then Harry can spend his time helping others, looking for Sumalee, trying to contact his family, and grieving/understanding this horrible tragedy. In this story, the tsunami is not simply another thing that affects Harry...it IS the story. I think it has to come way earlier and dictate everything that Harry decides to do.
Sumalee was the storyline that resonated with me, but there is so little attention paid to her after Harry and her get separated. I feel like this is a setup for a journey story of Harry and Sumalee trying to find each other in the midst of the horrible aftermath of the tsunami. I connected with their relationship, but then it goes away. If you want them to end up apart, that's fine, but I at least want to see a scene where they have to face each other.
Finally, I want to note that the tsunami was the greatest natural tragedy in modern history in terms of loss of human life. If you want to tackle this subject, first off let it be the whole story, and secondly, I think there's no room at all for comic relief. A lot of the story struck me as in bad taste. Harry's quip at the driver regarding the Bond film was very out of place. Don't show tampons going by right before dead bodies. And even the guy who was hawking phones off of the dead seemed bad. I know you were showing him in a bad light, but it's so despicable it takes me out of the story.
Even the American who took the suit off of Harry's back didn't work. Yes, he is horrible and I know I'm supposed to hate him, but after he behaves like that, shouldn't Harry be ultra-inspired to be extra good and help people. Instead, he half-asses the Sumalee search, goes home and stays to be a grandpa.
I don't mean to come down hard, but I really wanted to express my visceral reaction to a lot of the stuff. You're clearly a good screenwriter, so I wanted to be as honest as possible.
Review of: FLOOD OF TEARS
reviewed by jakenp on 02/04/2012
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