What the hell is going on? Hahaha... For some weird reason I like this script. It's unique, has a weird feel, and the dialogue is crazy.
BUT -- I'm a man who enjoys well produced films... and... This isn't winning any awards, but if you were planning on filming, I wouldn't mind watching.
To tell you all the things to make this industry standard would take forever, so I'm just going to tell you the things I really enjoyed and you can decipher what you need to work on, if you want to actually work on the screenplay.
The beginning started off as any other "I see it coming" movie, but moved into something totallty different with SF and the flower delivery. I don't know how much I enjoyed the BILLY and WHORE bit, BUT that's where I was intrigued.
When David met Phil I felt a sense of drug dealer movie type thing going on and then it went into real-estate which was interesting but almost a ridiculous transition.
(The real-estate office was confusing) -- Also a lot of action lines are very vague and I would like more descriptions.
I like most of the housing stuff if not all of it. (BY THE WAY ALL THE SCENES WERE NICE AND TIGHT *GOOD WORK*) The intercuts between the housing scenes were okay, but weird in a confusing way -- for me and probably for most other people who don't like weird movies they would turn it off, so maybe re think it just a bit... At least transitioning wise. Maybe make the film more "fantasy-ish."
Overall -- I liked it a lot, but it would probably be too weird for most. And honestly the only real reason I liked it is because I like some different films that leave me "guessing what the fuck?"
Remember these are my opinions, take it with a grain of salt and good luck in the future.
Review of: Evergreen
reviewed by DJBFilmz on 03/14/2012
Other Reviews by DJBFilmz 32
A review of Pride Of Lyons (2012)by DJBFilmz on 10/25/2012Iíll start off by saying that I like this script. Quick read, funny in some areas to me (other parts are most likely funnier to others who are older than I) and you seem to have a good flow/structure here. So overall I think itís good. Broad comment: I think this is targeted toward an older group, because some of your jokes just didn't hit it for me, but I could see others... read
A review of The Carved Pumpkinby DJBFilmz on 08/31/2012I liked this short. When a film makes me wonder how you got some of the shots then it's defin a plus for me. Also very creative I thought and a bit weird in a good way. Also like your use of sound, it was very pro. There's not much negative I have beside quality but that could just be because of the web. Good work! - David
A review of Five Foot Tenby DJBFilmz on 08/24/2012I got this assignment and I was like, "Oh hey! I already seen this!" Yeah I liked this film a lot. Honestly I don't really have anything to add. Acting is good, sound is nice, the story is what really sells it. Has a bit of a mystery even though it's so short. Very well done piece. It's short and too the point. Like to see something longer from you. - David