No, seriously I did. I usually put a quirky headline whenever I review a script, but this screenplay deserves my initial thoughts.
This is a great read. So much of the dialogue and the characters ring fresh and hilarious. Rick and Victor's lines are very funny, as are the rest of the incidents.
Once I started reading this, I couldn't stop. I'm serious- it's true.
I liked the unfolding mystery very much, with all these twists and turns that you're constantly addicted to the script.
This is obviously a Dark Comedy/Thriller, because of all the good lines and then all the blood you throw on us. Loved the final twist, too!
So was Victor the only one who he said he was? I had to go back and check to make sure Yuki's plan worked accordingly.
I'm also confused by the beginning. Who was the Portly Man? Did I miss something? What did he provide to the story?
Some of your formatting is wrong. You need to put either "DAY" or "NIGHT" after
Spellcheck this again, too. Many "your" when it should be "you're".
But I'd really love to watch this on the big screen. You have a neat structure and juggle thrills with laughs- that's pretty professional in my opinion.
And one last thing, shouldn't Yuki let the Female Assassin live and have what she actually did haunt her for the rest of her life, instead of her realizing it and just dying? So much for his revenge if it's all over with a bullet!
Best of luck!
Review of: Here's To Revenge
reviewed by silverberetta17 on 03/11/2008
Other Reviews by silverberetta17 23
A review of Double Vision (The Next Revision)by silverberetta17 on 11/02/2009Well, well, well. I was very excited to delve into my first Bob script. I've heard great things about your writing...but finally needed to see one for myself. Bob, you write exceptionally well. Your descriptions and actions are crisp and succinct. You get to the point in every scene and that's wonderful. Of course you know that already. Your dialogue is very good. I mean... read
A review of America Lostby silverberetta17 on 04/19/2008This review is especially difficult for me because while I agree with the message here, the story and characters do not work for me at all. Overall, there was way too much talking, nothing really going on that moved me, and stock characters that didn't do anything for this material. A huge disappointment. I couldn't get over your heavy-handedness of this argument here. Let... read
A review of Out of Contextby silverberetta17 on 03/24/2008I wanted to watch this short because the synopsis seemed eerily similar to a script I'm working on. Having said that, I think this is a neat little short. I liked all of the shots as it kept me intrigued as to what the mystery here was. The acting was all good, and this is a very well made piece from a technical standpoint. Now I think there might be one too many lines devoted... read