Goose is well written, your imagery is clean and unconfusing. It's easy to for the reader to get into the character's shoes. It also evokes the feeling of living on the fringe, a place where people fell through the cracks, or dove through of their own will. Well done.
What it doesn't do is tell a story. There's sort of a story with Matt and Roger, but there's really no detail. Our protagonist never does anything to drive the story forward, he just reports the events that happen around him to us. At the end, I'm still unsure as to what the purpose of the story was.
Review of: Goose Hollow Christmas
reviewed by krtshadow on 11/16/2008
Other Reviews by krtshadow 123
A review of The Lamentby krtshadow on 05/23/2011My assumption is that the author intends the piece to be relatively meandering, and not to wrap up neatly. However, I find myself wondering what the overall point of the piece is. We meet Nathan at the 'end' of his journey, and we are taken back to the beginning, so to speak. What the author does (I think) is try to conjure some sympathy for poor, exiled Nathan. I found... read
A review of The Car and Candiceby krtshadow on 12/17/2009...and lots of them. I feel like I knew where you were going with this story, but I don't think you got there. You drowned the story in description, and while it's apparent this was deliberate it ended up drowning the reader. In some cases, it just became confusing. There was plenty of time spent on Al, the job, cruising to the triangle, the limo, but little actual interaction... read
A review of Lust, Love and Horseshoesby krtshadow on 12/17/2009It took a little while to get into your story. The first sentence wasn't promising. I would have liked the story to start with the actual dialogue. It immediately puts the reader into the scene with Tessie and Elaine. Moving into the story, it takes a while to become engaged with the story. The first scene between Arnold and Tessie doesn't feel very natural. While it's... read