reviewed by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 12/03/2004
I happened upon this script by pure accident, and since I'm considering a story about a soldier dealing with PTSD, I was very interested to read it. The synopsis is engaging, so I started to read. First, let me say that I read it cover to cover in 2 sittings. It was engaging and had great story elements. The dialogue was good, and could stand a tiny bit of tightening. I am of the belief that dialogue should sound as if it's the most interesting way to say anything. The characters were good, but the duality of Eileen's role (her conflict being internal) could have been stronger. I think there's an underlying structural weakness in that the audience has no real hint at the grim reality of her true weakness. We assume for too long that it's just standard POW problems. If there was some stronger hint that there was something more to her story earlier, you would have me wondering and more engaged. As it is, I felt a lull about 50 pages (don't recall exact page count). The twist is good and it makes for a truly bittersweet resolution. I'm a pretty macho guy and I was nearly crying at the end. I have more to say, but am running out of room....that's a good sign.
NOTE: This review does not factor into the site rankings.

Other Reviews by **DELETED ACCOUNT** 3429

  • A review of Totally To The Max
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 07/25/2014
    After FADE IN: what does "SUBURBS, NORTHEAST USA, MID 80s, END OF SUMMER" mean? If the writer intends on that text being seen on the screen then it needs to be preceded with SUPER: "SUBURBS, NORTHEAST... Page 1. There is an extra space between Mamie's dialogue and the parenthetical (to Allison). Putting this reader on guard for more problems. An experienced reader is jarred... read
  • A review of Reaping Profit
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 07/24/2014
    'Reaping Profit' was a very interesting take on the subject of life/death & heaven/hell with an absurdist/comical approach and some hilarious situations. That being said, there were some things I had difficulty with, along with some structural issues that made this a difficult read for me. As far as the characters, the only one I really was concerned with was Jack. Death and... read
  • A review of P.A.M.
    by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 07/15/2014
    P.A.M is an entertaining, high-octane, fast moving zombie picture. I read this in one sitting and it was overall an enjoyable read. I’ll try and talk high level and hopefully some of this will be helpful. Your opening was untraditional as far as the zombie movies I have seen. Normally we get that opening of 10 or more pages/minutes where all is fine and dandy before the world... read
+ more reviews