Review of: The Water Carrier 

reviewed by Suesea on 08/16/2010
Credited Review
Suesea
The Water Carrier Credited Review
This story is about a water shortage. The writer describes life where you have to pay for the water you need each day. The story lacks impact because of the way it's written. It would help to tell less of the story and show more of through what the characters do and say. Also, the characters are given names, but they aren't fully developed. There's not enough depth or emotion for me to be fully engaged.

The twist at the end where the shortage stems from a broken pipe is OK, but it doesn't wow me with action or even through the characters reaction to figuring this out. The character receives the information passively. The story is enjoyable, but I think it can be more.

“...for longer distances than she was wont to do tired as she was...” than she wanted

“A low gurgle caught her unawares.” unaware

Good luck with this.

Suesea

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