Review of: i WanT tO kiLL 

reviewed by muis on 09/21/2009
Credited Review
muis
Well written Dexter-ish story Credited Review
I liked this screenplay a lot. You did a good job setting up his story. I especially like Selena's remark at the beginning about Ned not burning down the house by accident - and eventually Ned disposing of his former life by burning it down on purpose.

The dialogs were well written. I'm not too sure about the use of character names in the dialogs. Like "Ned, you lazy..." Seems like people don't talk like that in real life. At least, not as excessive as this. Overall they seemed very natural.

The main character reminded me of the TV-series character Dexter; a simple, friendly guy with a lust to kill that was inherited from his mass murdering father. Maybe a little bit one-dimensional (a bit of a nitwit with only one desire: to kill).

He finally holds his sister at gun point while he interrogates her about his father. I feel you haven't done enough with that desire. During the story I didn't realize it was that important to Ned so his "tell me about father"-cries didn't do anything for me.

I did love all the violence. Although the butt rape at the beginning caught me off guard.

7/10

Other Reviews by muis 3

  • by muis on 08/18/2003
    The story had me flipping the pages, but it's not a great story. Unfortunately the first things that went through my mind were: too much description, poor characters and poor formatting.Throughout the story your descriptions (especially the theater ones) are twice as long as theyshould be. That's why your SP is 125 pages long. You describe everything, from carpet color to doorknobs... read