MikeBeebs 

member since 04/22/2010 | last login 05/26/2010

I am new to the whole screenwritng world, but I find it fascinating. There is so much to learn. I am from Atlanta, Georgia but currently live in North Carolina. I work in an unrelated field....

Bio

I am new to the whole screenwritng world, but I find it fascinating. There is so much to learn. I am from Atlanta, Georgia but currently live in North Carolina. I work in an unrelated field.

Submissions by MikeBeebs

Reviews by MikeBeebs 4

  • A review of The Painter's Wife
    by MikeBeebs on 05/03/2010
    The Painter's wife is a very good screenplay. The development of the Diego character and his realtionship with Emily is the highlight. The way it is slowly yet powerfully brought about is impressive. The main issue with this script, I would have to say, is the length. 140 pages is too long especially for a romance where 90 pages is closer to the norm. What could be cut out,... read
  • A review of The Current
    by MikeBeebs on 04/29/2010
    The Current is a brutal, unrelenting script. Do not make the same mistake that I did and read it over lunch. It was a good read, but you have to be careful of when you read it. The structure and format were both excellent. There were a few typos (P104. Shirley instead of Sheldon in characters name and P.51 grammar) but nothing major. The story itself was above average. Marnie... read

Comments About MikeBeebs 4

  • 1sophiaben on 05/05/2010

    Hi Mike

    Many thanks for your useful comments on Sarah's soul.

    The concept of Congrulenca (name based on the word conguence) I felt was our earthly equilavent of a psychotherapist, so I wanted the audience to make their own conclusions about this spiritual character, so not sure how I might change the first scene, will sleep on that one.

    Punctuation wise, I take your points, will look at those too.

    Thankyou for your honesty.

    When I am writing I visually see my screenplays running through my own mind, I so need to remember that an audience needs to be drawn into the first scene...ie Sarah's relationship with her children etc. and not take it for granted that they already know.

    Warm regards

    J Hall (1sophiaben)
  • calevitt1968 on 05/03/2010

    Thanks for taking the time to read "The Painter's Wife". I think we must be psychically linked as your comments echo some of the thoughts I've had about the script. I am thinking of removing the job references, at least as far as the promotion goes because I realized, other than her assistant David, she never even mentions the promotion to Diego or Zoe. So how important can it be? LOL!! I also would like to come up with a more original way of her finding out about the affair, or maybe just starting the movie after the fact... It is cliché and overused as a device.

    Anyway, I really appreciate your comments. If anything else comes to mind, let me know. I look forward to reading anything that you submit. Let me know when you post.
  • crowovw on 04/30/2010

    Thanks so much for reading Bannersfield and taking the time to point out some of the errors, I'll surely go back and polish it up a bit. Towards the end just to clear it up it's mentioned only one that the symbols are Sumerian. And Molly says in the library that the language is the oldest known to man which is believed to be Sumerian. I'll give it another shot and pull out some of the characters in the beginning a bit more.
    Thanks again!!
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