mmckean 

member since 03/13/2010 | last login 01/16/2014

Starting all over....

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Starting all over.

Submissions by mmckean

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Reviews by mmckean 114

  • A review of Modern Nostalgia
    by mmckean on 03/20/2013
    Hey Adamrc, Your screenplay, Modern Nostalgia, is very well-written but, as I say in the title of my review, there is still some work to do in terms of the actual story. First I want to point out a few things that I liked about the script. David's dialogue, where he responds to Jon by saying that a lot of people are saying they are his son is pretty funny. Good job on that!... read
  • A review of Splintered
    by mmckean on 03/17/2013
    Hey Vbrewer1, I commend you on completing a fairly good script. If I had to guess, I would say you have been writing screenplays for a while now, or you have done a lot of research on how to write one. The actual writing and description in the story is superb. Everything flows well and is a quick and easy read. I like how you set the scene by describing what the characters... read
  • by mmckean on 08/04/2012
    The actually writing is excellent. The story idea needs a little work though, it's pretty cliche. This script is gonna be a hard sell. I'm on page 19 and I don't feel like the script is pushing me along to read more. The killer with the axe was interesting, but it didn't involve the main character directly. By page 10, the main character should be involved and the story should... read
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Comments About mmckean 43

  • alexs1227 on 12/08/2013

    Hi!

    Thank you so much for taking the time to review my short story, "Glass." I really appreciate the compliments as well as the constructive criticism,

    Alex S
  • Casey Major-Lehto on 09/01/2013

    Thanks for the review. You were spot on about pretty much everything. Everything except the part of me writing for a long time. I started writing here on TSL 3 months ago, so i took it as quite a compliment, but i realize that i have room for growth!

    Thanks, Casey P
  • ron gannon on 08/30/2013

    Thanks for the read, Mike.

    Since you asked, I do have a question.

    I have no idea what you meant by, "I was lost throughout most of it"

    What exactly do you mean or do not understand?

    Is there a sentence or line of dialogue you didn't understand?

    Or is it you can't understand why those people did what they did?

    When did you get lost? Did you understand what was happening on page 1, 2, etc. etc.?
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