Paul Ulrich

A review of Shades of Gray

by Paul Ulrich on 10/12/2007

This was a good script with well delineated characters and a nicely woven story line. The characters were believable, and the dialogue was good. The logline or production notes mentioned Boston as the locale, but I guess you changed that to Providence. At any rate, you captured the mannerisms correctly (I'm from in between the two places). One thing I'm not sure of - do blacks... read

Planet of the Lesbos

A review of Slave

by Paul Ulrich on 10/11/2007

Some page-by-page comments or notes below. This opened creatively – although by the first act I was wondering why it needed to be during the Civil War. The main characters are somewhat stereotypical – beautiful Virginia, handsome Brady. Could you make them more three-dimensional? As I read this, I’m also not buying into Brady’s dilemma of not wanting to sleep with a beautiful... read

Jack Me Tender, Jack Me Sweet

A review of The Lonesome Crowded West-

by Paul Ulrich on 10/06/2007

I dunno. Your title was lame (everything else in the script was pretty good, though) so I'm just imagining a potential other title. I'm sure you can think of something better. Overall you wrote a well structured, romcom – played by the book, but it kept my interest, and I read it more carefully than is often the case. The banter didn’t have me laughing out loud, but I recognized... read

Needs More Conflict

A review of The Musician

by Paul Ulrich on 09/29/2007

Your first ten pages lack a hook to develop a reader’s interest. There’s too much of the “pouring tea” syndrome – a problem for both novelists and screenwriters. You’re describing mundane things, with dialogue about counting change, how are you, blah blah. Not interesting, unfortunately. Movie dialogue shouldn’t be like real-life dialogue, most of which is boring chitchat... read

Deja Vu all over again

A review of Evenings And Weekends

by Paul Ulrich on 09/29/2007

This script seems vaguely familiar: perhaps I read an earlier incarnation about two years ago. The premise I think was the same, but hey it was assigned to me, so here goes: a setting entirely in a hotel is more suited to a stage play than the big screen. For those who have stayed at nice hotels, as many film execs presumably have, the descriptions and dialogue related to... read

FACE OFF

A review of The Line Of Departure (Rev. 1)

by Paul Ulrich on 09/28/2007

This has a good concept, but I got the sense that you were padding the story, or else that, as presently constructed, it should be a short film, not a feature. The best parts were, for me, the emotional interchange or unspoken concerns between the two fathers. If I were you, I’d focus more on that, and less on the mechanics or details of the military field. As you can see... read

Cage aux Folles meets Queer Eye for the Straight Guy

A review of WITCHEVER

by Paul Ulrich on 09/27/2007

As a closet homo-phobe, this isn't exactly my style, but hey it seems to work. Several reasons: 1) This reads very quickly. 2) The dialogue is sharp, witty, and spot on. 3) concision. You don’t waste a single word so kudos on that. I also like how you effortlessly convey Carlos’ accent with the “ju” instead of “you” and your single line characterizations of some of the... read

getting lost along the way

A review of A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Altar

by Paul Ulrich on 09/15/2005

I recently read another romcom that suffered from a similar drawback as this one: you fail to explain why the heroine is engaged to such a fool in the first place. The characters all seem like flat cut-outs with nothing distinctive about them. Lacking anyone to cheer for, I didn*t really care what happened in this story. You probably had too many characters and therefore didn*t... read

left wanting more

A review of An Unnatural Soldier (Rev 4)

by Paul Ulrich on 09/13/2005

The writing in this script was excellent: clean and to the point. You cover a lot of ground, giving the reader a kind of synopsis of the Union march to victory in the Civil War. By doing that, however, the story becomes picaresque, with events following one after another to the tune of history, but not as consequences of earlier actions. Characters appear along the way and... read

Well done

A review of Lost Son

by Paul Ulrich on 09/04/2005

Very nice story and the best I*ve read for quite some time. You had a great premise and followed through with a good structure, sympathetic characters, and clear/believable dialogue. One area that could use a bit more thought would be the plot and the interaction between husband and wife. I thought the last part of the second act was the one weak area in the story. Maybe you... read

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Submissions by Paul Ulrich

Reviews by Paul Ulrich 46

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Submissions by Paul Ulrich

Reviews by Paul Ulrich 46

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