PeacefullySubjected 

member since 03/12/2009 | last login 07/15/2013

My dad instilled in me a love of reading ever since I was born. I would sit summers alone in any small quiet space I could find and spend the day with a book. I soon fell in love with writing as...

Bio

My dad instilled in me a love of reading ever since I was born. I would sit summers alone in any small quiet space I could find and spend the day with a book. I soon fell in love with writing as well. Then life happened and I put both of these loves aside. While editing is more up my alley - I have spent the last few years catching up with books and just recently began tampering with my creative side again. I have a long way to go yet, but I'm having fun getting my feet wet. (As a reviewer/editor I tend to be a bit on the harsh side. I believe that no one ever improved by being placated about their ability or work. Don't be offended if I'm hard on you - I do it only in service of helping you get better.)

Submissions by PeacefullySubjected

Reviews by PeacefullySubjected 136

  • A review of SKIN DEEP
    by PeacefullySubjected on 07/09/2009
    Well isn’t that the shit? I knew there was going to be a twist because you mention it in your production notes (and you’re right, it will save that way for a while) but I certainly wouldn’t have guessed as to the true twist. Haha – nicely done – it doesn’t pay to be shallow! Overall the story was well told, simple and concise. You gave a small background to Maria, enough... read
  • by PeacefullySubjected on 07/08/2009
    This story ended on a note that made it impossible to hate. Dislike, maybe – but definitely not hate. Dislike might even be a strong word. Overall it had heart, and really, besides good writing, what more can you ask for from a story. This one had both. But there was enough for me to nit pick at on my way through that I didn’t care for it as much as I could have. Now,... read
  • A review of Our Danse Macabre
    by PeacefullySubjected on 07/07/2009
    Mr. Wolf. I’ve been bored at work and have been plucking stories to read simply for the fun of it. I’ve come across 2 of yours today based solely on their premises alone – this one and “Itchy.” I love them both. You’re a unique storyteller – have you attempted getting published? I hope so. You should. I don't generally give Free Will reviews unless something strikes me,... read
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Comments About PeacefullySubjected 68

  • VictorFiction on 07/08/2009

    Hey thanks for your review. From what you wrote I can tell that the piece is connecting on some level. The karma part was actually on purpose (hence, karma sutran instead of kama sutra) to show the ignorance of the officer and to introduce the idea of karma into Paul's thinking. The omniscience on behalf of Paul comes from my belief that Bea is a character in his story and that he should be allowed to be all knowing. Maybe it works and maybe it doesn't, but since it happens a couple times I feel like it reads 'on purpose'.

    Probably not a great sign that I had to explain those, but all of your other suggestions are definitely going to fit into the next draft. You are a fantastic and fair reviewer.

    Thanks for reading
  • jkendell on 07/07/2009

    Hi peacefully subjected

    thanks very much for your recent criticism of Afterlife inc. your feedback is very helpful and given me plenty to think about. Several of your comments such as requiring further detail about the functionality of hte afterlife system are things that I have written, but cut as I was afriad I was getting caught up in the concept at the expense of the story. I shall have another look at it.

    I would also be interested in your opinion of what for me is the underlying premise of the story. The reason we don't know much detail about what actually happens when you die and get transfered into the afterlife system (eg can people access the system and talk to their relatives?) is because I want to keep it deliberately ambiguous. We are never provided with any evidence that an afterlife system exists other than the building itself. The computers are disappointingly small and when Mike asks for further info he is cut off. Basically people belief in the afterlife system as a matter of faith, but they have this faith and adjust their behavour accordingly because the system is based on technology not 'spirituality'. The story is kind of a metaphor for how technology has replaced spirituality.

    I realise this sounds unbelieveably pretentious, which I guess is the problem. Nonetheless I do think its an interesting idea. I guess my issue is how can I bring this theme into greater focus without 'giving the game away'?

    thanks agian

    Jkendell
  • awohnout on 07/01/2009

    Hey, thanks for the review of "Darling, You Send Me." You made some fantastic suggestions that I will definitely put to use during my revisions. The mention of the spouse's name is a brilliant idea. Also, thanks a lot for the punctuation catch. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks again.
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