Reviews of Checkmate 47

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  Review: Checkmate
  A review of Checkmate
  by writermorris on 05/23/2013
  I'm on a real lucky streak with the reviews on TS, I have not had a vampire for a week or so, and this story also cheered me up no end. Although the story was on the face of it slightly run of the mill, with younger man challenging the older one at a game of chess, and the familiar scene that goes with young challenging old, I thought the ending was beautifully crafted and... I'm on a real lucky streak with the reviews on TS, I have not had a vampire for a week or so, and this story also cheered me up no end. Although the story was on the face of it slightly run of the mill, with younger man challenging the older one at a game of chess, and the familiar scene that goes with young challenging old, I thought the ending was beautifully crafted and executed. I really enjoyed the sparse but to the point dialogue. Great story which will linger long in my mind. Thank you for an excellent read. read
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  Checkmate - A Review
  A review of Checkmate
  by Michael Leath on 05/02/2013
  There was a feel to this similar to Walter S. Tevis' "The Hustler." Nothing alike, but the repartee between the old man and the young man was reminiscent of Burt and Fast Eddie. Not Fast Eddie and Minnesota Fats, as you would think. Great tale with sharp dialog. Characters weren't flat, but the brevity of the story didn't leave a lot of time to put in the subtle clues to who... There was a feel to this similar to Walter S. Tevis' "The Hustler." Nothing alike, but the repartee between the old man and the young man was reminiscent of Burt and Fast Eddie. Not Fast Eddie and Minnesota Fats, as you would think.
  
  Great tale with sharp dialog. Characters weren't flat, but the brevity of the story didn't leave a lot of time to put in the subtle clues to who they were. Not specifically, but as people.
  
  Nice twist at the end. very nice ending. Great wording.
  
  I enjoyed this story and found it to be crafted well.
  
  Thanks for sharing.
  ~
  M read
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  A Sure Win
  A review of Checkmate
  by mnjones on 11/08/2010
  Very nicely written in a calm, unemotional voice that, I thought, gave it great impact. The ending was neither a cheap twist nor a big surprise, but nevertheless touching and satisfying. The writing is clear and clean, not fancy, without a lot of "writer" showing--except on page 1, when the narrator says, "I was going to beat him for sure" and again on page 3 when he says,... Very nicely written in a calm, unemotional voice that, I thought, gave it great impact. The ending was neither a cheap twist nor a big surprise, but nevertheless touching and satisfying. The writing is clear and clean, not fancy, without a lot of "writer" showing--except on page 1, when the narrator says, "I was going to beat him for sure" and again on page 3 when he says, "This one is mine for sure, I kept telling myself." These remarks are the writer's attepts to set up the reader. The narrator knows what the outcome will be. It happens evry two weeks. These two lines could be dropped, I think, and the story would be stronger.
  
  Page 2:
  
  "Are you married," He asked. Missing question mark; He should be he.
  
  "Such as life, I thought to myself." Such is? read
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  Checkmate Review
  A review of Checkmate
  by Gabigabs on 11/08/2010
  I found this to be a very pleasant story, bittersweet in a way but very nicely written, truthfully reflecting on life. The smooth style made it an easy read. As a person who never once played chess I probably did not fully appreciate the chess related descriptions, and I was not sure whether the certain moves the author used had a special meaning related to the storyline, but... I found this to be a very pleasant story, bittersweet in a way but very nicely written, truthfully reflecting on life. The smooth style made it an easy read. As a person who never once played chess I probably did not fully appreciate the chess related descriptions, and I was not sure whether the certain moves the author used had a special meaning related to the storyline, but despite that fact I still had a good feel for the story and its characters.
  
  I would like to see more emotions coming from the young man, but on the other hand I am not quite sure how much more could the author get away with without giving away the ending.
  
  Couple running notes:
  
  Pg 1 - "As I approached he was sitting on an outside stone bench, staring at the stone
  pillar in front of him." I think he would more likely be starring at the actual board while sitting? Or is the board so high that people have to stand while playing.
  
  Pg. 4 - I though revealing the old man's identity was a very nice twist and the author handled it well.
  
  In overall very nice story. Good Luck with it! read
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  Checkmate
  A review of Checkmate
  by YeahHi on 10/16/2010
  I like the twist at the end of this piece and the use of the chess moves in the narrative. I wonder if you could explain the significance of each move to those of us that don’t play, without bogging down the action. I like the old man’s lines: “Are you going to teach him how to play chess as shitty as his father?” “I have got you now.” I wanted the young man to engage in... I like the twist at the end of this piece and the use of the chess moves in the narrative. I wonder if you could explain the significance of each move to those of us that don’t play, without bogging down the action.
  
  I like the old man’s lines:
  “Are you going to teach him how to play chess as shitty as his father?”
  “I have got you now.”
  
  I wanted the young man to engage in the banter with better comebacks.
  
  “I am thirty-two years his younger.” Should be “his junior”. Or, “he is 32 years my senior.”
  
  I like the hope that the young man has that he will, one of these weeks, get his chess champion father back, but until then, putting the poor guy through a confusing loss every week seems cruel.
  
  Best of luck with the story,
  Shauna read
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  BLIND SIDE
  A review of Checkmate
  by gclifton on 07/20/2010
  This is a pretty innovative piece wherein the writer weaves a routine chess game into a story with considerable practical value in the real world: Keep your eye on the ball. The kid gets a little backstory (wife, kids, family) but the master might benefit by a line or two of character expansion. But that's not criticism. Checkmate is an interesting little tale with no ugly... This is a pretty innovative piece wherein the writer weaves a routine chess game into a story with considerable practical value in the real world: Keep your eye on the ball.
  
  The kid gets a little backstory (wife, kids, family) but the master might benefit by a line or two of character expansion. But that's not criticism.
  
  Checkmate is an interesting little tale with no ugly events or harsh overtones which is easily read. Well said. read
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  Moving
  A review of Checkmate
  by dunphoid on 02/23/2010
  This was a moving story which I'm sure many readers can identify with. This was a nice, swift read that registered an emotional punch. Just one little thing was missing for me personally - I would have liked a hint of the sounds of the location. A distant hedge-trimmer, or cooing birds, I don't know - it's just that when reading this story I somehow imagined these subtle... This was a moving story which I'm sure many readers can identify with. This was a nice, swift read that registered an emotional punch.
  
  Just one little thing was missing for me personally - I would have liked a hint of the sounds of the location. A distant hedge-trimmer, or cooing birds, I don't know - it's just that when reading this story I somehow imagined these subtle noises in my head. Perhaps that's the effect the story has on most people, but I would prefer to see some hints of ambient noise written into this story.
  
  Actually, I would also like to get a feel for the weather in this piece. The name of the home "Shady Lanes" suggested the home could be a retreat from the scorching sunshine that the men play chess in, perhaps wearing caps to shield their faces from the rays.
  
  I liked how the story ended with a little hope that someday his father might actually checkmate him. I got the sense that all was not lost - there is always some hope to be had.
  
  Nicely written. Well done! read
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  Checkmate
  A review of Checkmate
  by Jon_Lymon on 02/17/2010
  Got to admit, I thought this was heading nowhere. A story about a game of chess is hardly going to grip, even though I love the game. But the twist at the end was extremely powerful, and highly emotional. It casts the whole story in a different light. I found myself re-reading it with the knowledge that this is father vs son, with son really wishing his aged, alzheimer-stricken... Got to admit, I thought this was heading nowhere.
  
  A story about a game of chess is hardly going to grip, even though I love the game.
  
  But the twist at the end was extremely powerful, and highly emotional. It casts the whole story in a different light. I found myself re-reading it with the knowledge that this is father vs son, with son really wishing his aged, alzheimer-stricken father would win the game.
  
  Very cleverly written. Definitely a story to be read twice, from a completely different perspective each time. read
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  CHECKMATE ON HIMSELF
  A review of Checkmate
  by **DELETED ACCOUNT** on 12/28/2009
  This is a well written piece, short and to the point. But it strikes me as not so much funny as cruel. The guy must really hate his old man just to visit him every other week to exact revenge by playing chess with a man who has no memory. It also speaks sadly of the younger man’s lack of accomplishment and self worth. Nicely written, but sad. Thanks for posting it so we... This is a well written piece, short and to the point. But it strikes me as not so much funny as cruel. The guy must really hate his old man just to visit him every other week to exact revenge by playing chess with a man who has no memory. It also speaks sadly of the younger man’s lack of accomplishment and self worth. Nicely written, but sad. Thanks for posting it so we can read it. I hope the following notes are helpful:
  
  Page one: When your characters speak to each other you need to use commas. Such as: Hey, Bob, how about it? Or: How about it, Bob? Or: All right, old man, show me what you got.
  
  Page three: The following sentences contain a change of tense, from past to present. I hated (past) when he said that. It really gets (present) under my sink. Focus, I really need (pressent) to focus. read
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  Kevin228
  A review of Checkmate
  by american dan on 12/06/2009
  Interesting enough, I found the story to be a good read. It fascinates me how people communicate and how your story does just as well. It also fascinates me how the story goes on without any names, which in fact, is similar to our real world. We meet different people and start a conversation, and then we part without knowing their names or their history. This story reflects... Interesting enough, I found the story to be a good read. It fascinates me how people communicate and how your story does just as well. It also fascinates me how the story goes on without any names, which in fact, is similar to our real world. We meet different people and start a conversation, and then we part without knowing their names or their history. This story reflects the inner thoughts on Alzheimer, because the writer has a good insight to the situation. Although, we do not meet people with Alzheimers everyday, we do find sometimes we encounter someone who has this predicament. The story has a nice flow and the characters identity are spoken through the writer's point of view. The story has a good format, visibly easy to read. The thought to this story makes it understandable to certain interest, especially when the writer is targeting a certain group of audiences/viewers/readers. Empathy is the word that comes to mind, the foundation to this story.
  It is a good read.
  
  American Dan read